THE WRITER MUST EAT -> patreon.com/trn1ty <-

| \    |   | blah!
|\ | `\|\  | the rantings and ravings
|/ |(_|| | * of a depraved lunatic

<^>

2023-02-22

	I clocked in at work and washed my hands and scrubbed at my palms and
tried to scratch the dirt off my flesh but it was UNDER my skin and I got my
keys out of my pocket and started picking in to try to get it but then I was
perforated and leaking hydraulic fluid and then

	StackOverflow for writing (/b/)

	Mainstream politics warning |\
				____' \___________________________
                               | Buttigieg got handed the one job |
                               | Biden didn't think he could fuck |
                               | up and still did?________________|

	and then I clocked in at work and washed my hands only once and dried
them with the towel and then went to my desk and then tried to log in to my
workplace Microsoft account and then it didn't work so I tried typing harder
but that didn't work either so I took the keyboard and

	I miss the old #meth. #90skidsgetit

	We stood outside as snow fell.
	"So... when does this kick in?"
	"I dunno. Eventually." didn't give me a lot of confidence that it
would.
	"Am I smoking it wrong?" I took a hit. Three seconds. Exhale.
	"Three seconds is how long most people hold it. That's what I do."
	Puff puff pass. I took my second hit. Three seconds. Exhale. "That's
what I'm doing."
	"You have to smoke a lot of a joint to get high. I think you just
haven't smoked enough." He was nibbling his way through an edible while she and
I took hits. 50mg.
	"I mean, I smoked that roach, and I took a couple hits off that first
joint. Isn't that enough?" I turned to her. She shrugged. Puff puff pass, back
to me.
	We were listening to Helena (My Chem) on her phone. It hit the chorus
and I started dancing, probably poorly. Go white girl! "Maybe you have a
naturally high tolerance and you need to smoke a ton to get high."
	"Fucking hell." It had taken years for me to build up the nerve to try
weed. Theoretically it can put me into psychosis. But I don't care anymore.
Worst case scenario, I'm psychotic, I still act the same I just don't believe
anything, same as I was for years. Hell years, years of my life I'll never get
back. Estrogen be thy cure.

	I don't remember how the subject changed.
	"I don't even know if I can feel love anymore."
	He was lost in the THC. She hadn't dropped out yet. "Neither can I.
After my thing with [...] something just sort of broke. But it's freeing"
	"Yeah. It kicks ass. Bitches ain't shit, and they don't have to be.
You can't really trust anything nowadays."
	"Yeah but it's fucked. [...] is the love of my life. And I don't love
him."
	"Yeah. But you like him. I'm talking to someone right now, no
relationship or anything, and it's fucked because if they say they love me or
anything I'm gonna have to give them the talk, like, my brain don't work no
more."

Left for dead and then they all died
Didn't think I could kick it and then I survived
Another psychic soldier get legitimate and hide
The last gate keeper among memetic socialites

	Questionable Content by Jeff Jacques is probably one of my biggest
creative influences but I barely remember any of it now.

	Holy shit, I don't remember writing any of that. Just took an edible so
we'll see if that gets me high.

[...]: I dunno... maybe try smoking more?
[...]: Some people can have naturally high tolerances.
[...]: That can't happen.
[...]: Maybe you were high and didn't notice it.

<^>

No rights reserved, all rights exercised, rights turned to lefts, left in this
corner of the web.